Your Biggest Fan

I don't care if your wife's sitting 3 rows back,
With your mistress behind her ready to attack,
Cause I paid a day's pay just to get in this game,
So you better believe I'll find someone to blame,

If you start to perform like an overpaid bum,
And you cause us to lose what we sure should have won,
My alcohol courage is starting to flow,
And I feel like I'm growing like your ego,

I'm your biggest fan,
Even when it appears that you don't give a damn,
I'm your biggest fan,
Cause it feels so good when you play like you can,
Like Madden to Favre it's the love for a man,
That I feel for you cause I'm your biggest fan,

Your Fathead is hung on my cinderblock wall,
In my basement at home where I watch you play ball,
As I put on your jersey and scream out your name,
Don't give me this crap how it's only a game,

Cause it's life as I know it inside of that screen,
I either love you or hate you there's no in between,
If you blow this game I might blow up your car,
But if you pull it out I will say you're a star,

I'm your biggest fan,
Even when it appears that you don't give a damn,
I'm your biggest fan,
Cause it feels so good when you play like you can,
Like Madden to Favre it's the love for a man,
That I feel for you cause I'm your biggest fan,

I sing all about how you are a disgrace,
But it's nothing I ever would say to your face,
Unless I was insane or three sheets to the wind,
Just look at your picture you signed your friend,

I'm your biggest fan,
Even when it appears that you don't give a damn,
I'm your biggest fan,
Cause it feels so good when you play like you can,
Like Madden to Favre it's the love for a man,
That I feel for you cause I'm your biggest fan ...

Sunday's Not The Same

I sit in my recliner staring at my big TV,
Watching awful Lifetime movies that my wife wants to see,
While the only games to pick from are basketball and golf,
I think I might be happier if she'd just turn it off,

Cause it's not time for March Madness although it's coming soon,
And the NBA playoffs don't get interesting til June,
I'm glad to read the headlines that Tiger's doing well,
But nothing can compare to my beloved NFL,

Sunday's not the same without another football game,
It seems the season ended a lot quicker than it came,
If it were just a little warmer I'd gladly cut the grass,
And grant my wife's wishes that I get up off my ass,
I wouldn't dare leave my chair if my favorite team were playing,
I'd be sitting here loud and clear ignoring what she's saying
But there's no scores to report and no referees to blame,
So I'll clean out the garage since Sunday's not the same,

The New York Giants celebrate their memories with a laugh,
But there's 31 losers looking forward to the draft,
Where there's hope for the hopeless cause when a season ends,
It means there's 7 months until another one begins,

I never thought I'd miss Troy Aikman and Phil Simms,
But the sound of their voices would be like the sweetest hymns,
From the minute they signed off acknowledging the champ,
I'll be counting down the minutes til they open training camp,

Sunday's not the same without another football game,
It seems the season ended a lot quicker than it came,
If it were just a little warmer I'd gladly cut the grass,
And grant my wife's wishes that I get up off my ass,
I wouldn't dare leave my chair if my favorite team were playing,
I'd be sitting here loud and clear ignoring what she's saying
But there's no scores to report and no referees to blame,
So I'll clean out the garage since Sunday's not the same,
Until next season starts - Sunday's not the same ...